things

walk on rocks

hold my hand

talk with silence

sink in sand

trip on hearts

whoosh in waves

skip the cash

fall for plays

chase the flowers

howl in wind

pace my breathing

love or spin

ignore the clouds

dance in rain

reward our vision

forget the pain

stare at shadows

sleep in sun

care & listen

scream then run

Sight - Illustration Friday

Participating in Illustration Friday for the first time today...
Thoughts?

You were thinking

Have you ever laid in the middle of nowhere and stared at the sky?

Have you ever stared at the sky and thought about nothing?

Oh, you have?

No, there is no way you have.

It’s impossible.

Maybe you thought you were thinking about nothing, but really you were thinking about the deep brilliant blues that kept changing as the hours passed and how fast the clouds swam through it.

You were thinking about the thick tall grass and being surrounded by hundreds of yellow dandelions.

You were thinking about the cool breeze on your bare limbs and how it complimented the warmth of the setting sun shining on your already rosy cheeks.

You were thinking about all the other times you have laid under the sky and how each season has its own sounds and scents.

You were thinking about the beauty of silence and how you wished it could be like that all the time.

You were thinking.

Ninety-Nine & Ready to Die

He laid on the bed ‘til the nurse came by,

“I’m ninety-nine and I’m ready to die.

“I’ve seen it all. There’s nothing left for me.

And if I can only leave one statement behind,

let me tell you that everyone is the same.

“They tell you when you’re young

everyone is unique and to judge each other for it.

But I’m telling you, we’re all the same.

“We are nothing but flesh, bone, and emotion

and we do nothing but hurt and kill.

That’s all that life really comes down to.

“Life baffles me. Though we all have identical pains

we insist on continuing the cycle.

They never learn from the mistakes.

“I have lost faith in all people.

I have set my standards low

in hopes to never be disappointed.

“Let me tell you, my dear, please learn from me.

No matter your methods of prevention,

disappointment will always be there for you.”

He turned to the left and closed his eyes for the last time

before he could see the nurse hadn’t stayed to listen.

Chai

I, Daena Elaine Urbanski, am 20 years old. I live in a not-so-small-but-big-either town in the ever so seasonally bipolar Northeast Ohio. I don’t know what I want for myself.

Things that are currently making me upset, being as specific as possible and appropriate for being on the internet where everyone can access it:

My brother and his engagement

My mother and her husband

My father

My friends

My job

…being alone

Ya know what, I think I can sum up all of my problems in one statement.

“I hate my job and I hate that I am no one’s priority.”

Totally living the cliché right now.

Sitting at panera

Sipping chai tea

And not doing anything productive.

And by that I mean I am sitting here

Creeping on facebook

And then blogging about it

What has my fucking life come to? I'm only 20 years old and I feel like I'm 100 and ready to die.*

I don’t really know but I just burned the fuck out of my tongue.

*Not like suicidal, but like "I am old. I have lived this life. I am ready for the next one. Ready, go!"

Everyone

Everyone wants to be different.

Everyone wants to be special.

Everyone wants to be that one,

but everyone is the same.

Everyone claims to make the effort.

Everyone claims to care.

Everyone claims to not be like the rest,

but everyone gives up eventually.

What makes me so different?

What about me makes everyone the same?

What is wrong with me,

and what makes me not worth it?

left or right?

The Middle.
I'm in the Middle.
The view of the stars is so boring from the Middle.
Why here?
I've never heard anyone claim they love being in the Middle.
The Middle-at least for me-isn't a life sentence.
The time has come, and I can leave it if I want.
To some there, is nothing wrong with being in the Middle.
But I think the Middle is so neutral; not quite enough danger and still a lack of safety.
Speaking of danger,
I've been told a lot of mass-murderers came from the Middle. I guess a lot of presidents, too.
What does that say about coming from the Middle?
The Middle.
It's not all bad.
I wouldn't trade my time in the Middle for the world.
But I've grown bored of being in the Middle.
Of all the places to be, why the Middle?
There is nothing left for me in the Middle.
This is it.
The Middle.